Celebrity

I was driving 40 miles an hour on the Pulaski Highway heading east towards the lab. My hands were gittery from all the excitement or from the glass of wine I drank 4 hours earlier. I couldn't tell. I called my sister. My brother-in-law answered the phone "Whazzup?" he said. "S, you'll never believe who I just met today? Gwen Ifil!"I screamed into the phone. "Who is that? Is she famous?" he asked.

Friday afternoon was 65 degrees with a slight breeze and no clouds in the sky. I wanted to get a little Vitamin D ans some fresh air. I had been cooped up in the lab all morning, setting up real-time PCR that was doomed for failure. I knew this and frantically finished it anyway. It was not until 1:45 until I was able to get lunch. Okay for most, but for some reason I get cranky when unfed. This lunch would have to be large and substantial. I opted for a gyro at Samos, which is 0.7 miles away.

During my walk, I dialed A. I wanted to tell someone about my fabulous night. "Okay so I had to pay like 40 bucks to go to this library fundraiser. By the way did you know that Baltimore has the olders public library system in America? Anyway this event was like 90 percent women."

"Of course it is. It is a library event," A said.

"Oh it was not just a library event it was a library fundraiser plus wine tasting. I think that effectively meant no men allowed. So there were a bunch of bankers and doctor's wives at this event. You know the fabulous kinds with pearls and handbags. I went because my new friend volunteers to raise funds for the library while she searches for a paying gig. I digress. I go to this event in a pair of wide leg jeans and a sweater, so I might be a tad underdressed. The main speaker for this event is Sharon Ifill, who is a prof of South African law at U. Maryland. So apartheid, constitution, equality and whatever. After the talk, I was standing with my friend and Gwen Ifill comes up to me and says, 'I love your shoes, I noticed them a while back and just wanted to tell you how fabulous they are.'"

"O my God, that is even better. A famous person complementing your shoes," A replied.

"Well I was like yeah I really like Washington Week. I was such an ass. Anyway, I was so super excited but my brother-in-law was like who is that?"

"Your brother-in-law and sister are from LA. I'm sure they saw real celebrities all the time," A said.

"Oh like Linsey Lohan? But I rather meet Gwen Ifill anyday."

"Celebrity is relative," said A. "Gwen is big to those of us who watch PBS because we still have rabbit years on our television.

By this time, I had already reached the restaurant and said good bye to A. While waiting for my sandwich, I ran into my boss's boss. He and I made awkward small talk as we waited for our lunches. Then we were interupted by a blur of grey permed hair.

"Hallo, Hallo remember me?" said an older lady frantically waving her hands.

"Oh, Hi," I said after checking around me to make sure she was talking to me.

"From the train," she said. Ah yes, I sat next to her on a train to DC.

"Well, it was nice to see you again," I said.

As the crazy old lady was leaving I overheard her conversation with her husband "Who was that girl?" he asked. "Remember the night of the Lincoln Center event. She is the one I have been telling you about," she replied.

My boss's boss gave me a strange look. "Guess your famous," he said.