Boys are scum. Well, that is probably too harsh an assessment, but if I want to become the bitter middle age woman I envision in my future I have to start somewhere. I guess the truth is that I have had some bad luck (and made some worse decisions) in my romantic entanglements, so it really is not the fault of all the males out there. Knowing where the fault lies, I will delude myself into believing the original assertion: boys are scum.
Making a conscience decision to cut out romance out of my summer has been suprisingly pleasant. Instead of being mopey, I accomplished a number of nagging tasks. I cleaned out my closet and getting the last vestiges of junior high. Considering the 80's are now chic, hopefully there is a 18 year old wearing my old banana republic baby doll thinking she is hot.
The collection of cards on my wall was getting overwhelming. Found special acid free plactic covers on the internet. I catalogued all of my postcards that are older than 2 years in a special album.
Most of my Saturday nights have been free. Those have been filled with reading and laundry. This Saturday, I reserved to read the last Harry Potter book, once again, confirming my status as Queen of the Nerds. After reading it I did have a headache, and my roomate convinced me that the cure for a headache caused by Wizards and Muggles was beer. We did a little bonding at the Corrib Pub althought the stain of nerdom was still on me.
I have planned a number of getaways. I will be going to Maine on the first weekend of August, Quebec City the third weekend, and Rhode Island the fourth. And while the might seem to have the hint of romance in them, all of them entail chaste girl bonding.
I think what suprised me the most of my monastic months, is how quickly the time has gone by. I have just turned my head, and already its mid-July. I have never been someone who has been incredibly boy crazy, so how is it that I see such a difference? How is it I have gotten so much more accomplished? Why do I feel just as busy as ever? Why am I so jolly?
Well, in the words of my future bitter self my summer is further evidence, "Boys are scum."
Monday, July 23, 2007
Friday, July 20, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
when stars align
I had the perfect sandwich for lunch yesterday -- the most perfectly assembled Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich that I have ever had. It was so perfect that I feel the need to blog about it. It's as though the stars aligned and everything about that sandwich was as it should be:1. The bread was not stale
2. The chicken patty was super crispy on the outside yet moist on the inside
3. It had the perfect amount of mayo (no spillage over the edge of the sandwich)
4. The lettuce and tomato were fresh and evenly disbursed
5. The sandwich itself was a thing of beauty -- it actually looked like this
My theory as to how this happened? I ordered said sandwich at 3:45 pm when there was no one else in line. It was probably the only sandwich being made while I was there so the person making it could focus all of their energy in on creating the most perfect fast food meal I have ever had (other than In n' Out). I guess this means I will have to order it again mid-afternoon to test my theory.
Monday, July 09, 2007
The mall and other earthly delights
Girl's club. That is what G, A's boyfriend, has deemed the alternative name for our book club. Maybe he imagines us braiding each other's hair, as we giggle about boys and our monthly cycles. Who knows? (I'm not any better because I always poker night as guys in a circle smoking cigars talking about getting laid.) For the most part, we do manage to discuss the book, nosh on food and chat about work, significant others etc.. Although that is not to say, an escape from the adult world is welcomed now and then.
On Sunday, after the book club meeting concluded, SS, agreed to drive me and my bike home. It was a hot and sticky day and the prospect of riding home was kind of gross. Luckily, SS had brought her family's minivan so it worked out pretty well. SS also wanted to go to Lord and Taylor to purchase some eye shadow from Clinique, who was having a bonus gift. A trip to the mall sounded delightful and I asked if I could tag along. A and NN were already going too and a group trip was almost an adventure. The four of us piled into silver people mover with my bike in the back. We drove to the Natick mall.
Now, I have not been to a mall since Christmas. Considering Independence Day had just passed, this statement sounds even more unamerican. But I live in a city, and I do about 99% of all of my shopping online.
When I walked in and the cool air conditioned breeze hit my face, I smelt the mixture of plastic, new clothes, and mall food. I was a little disoriented at first. I insisted to A that I had been to this mall before, but I could not remember the circumstances. But wasn't the Delaria hair salon on the 2nd floor? Then I realized that all malls were pretty similar, and what I was recognizing was a mall not any mall in particular.
We first went into PacSun, to say "hello" to NN's husband. Racks of brightly colored tanks tops were 50% off, attracting our attention immediately. We browsed, chatted a bit, and left.
Next stop was Lord and Taylor. The three of us milled around the Clinique counter and SS chose teal and grey eyeshadows. Which one did we like better? SS showed us all the color possibilities on the back of her right hand. After choosing two eyeshadows and one eyeliner, she took her special bonus gift and we were off again.
Staying with the theme of makeup, we made it up to Sephora. I was intrigued by the all the tools, scary medieval torture devices to remove and lance black heads, heated eyelash curlers, electronic pimple zappers, and brushes for every type of make-up application. I bought a tube of clear mascara, A light blue eyeshadow, and NN some mascara.
Now, we all had make up in our bags and felt a little giddy from the purchase. What was that delicious smell? SS said it was Auntie Anne's pretzels. If only it was Cinnabon, I would have been all over that.
After the mall, SS said we could stop by the bike store, if I wanted. Very exciting. We all piled back into the minivan. I can't remember what we were talking about, but for some reason it I remember laughing and thinking I was 16 again.
Wait, the golden arches ahead! I said. SS pulled into the McDonald's "drive thru". I love drive through windows. Back in the days when I had a car, my car was always littered with In & Out napkins, and El Pollo Loco straws. A says she loves nothing better than a fountain Coke. SS got soft serve. I got french fries and NN had a McDonald's gift card for all our mid afternoon snacks.
We got to the bike store soon after. I had forgotten how in the suburbs space was less on an issue and marveled at the rows of bicycles. Unfortunately, they did not have the single speed bike I wanted. But our saleman, J, was overjoyed to talk to us. He made wild hand gestures and asked us to follow him so could write down all the websites that I could look at to assemble my own bike. And then he said this "Oh a day with the girls. That sounds like so much fun. I used to have all of these friends that were girls but not so much anymore. Strange since I am a theater major and all...." SS and I laughed a little bit because how great would have been to have a college boy to crush on...well if we were still in high school.
SS dropped off us all home and as the sliding door of the minivan closed, I thought a girl's club may not be such a bad idea.
On Sunday, after the book club meeting concluded, SS, agreed to drive me and my bike home. It was a hot and sticky day and the prospect of riding home was kind of gross. Luckily, SS had brought her family's minivan so it worked out pretty well. SS also wanted to go to Lord and Taylor to purchase some eye shadow from Clinique, who was having a bonus gift. A trip to the mall sounded delightful and I asked if I could tag along. A and NN were already going too and a group trip was almost an adventure. The four of us piled into silver people mover with my bike in the back. We drove to the Natick mall.
Now, I have not been to a mall since Christmas. Considering Independence Day had just passed, this statement sounds even more unamerican. But I live in a city, and I do about 99% of all of my shopping online.
When I walked in and the cool air conditioned breeze hit my face, I smelt the mixture of plastic, new clothes, and mall food. I was a little disoriented at first. I insisted to A that I had been to this mall before, but I could not remember the circumstances. But wasn't the Delaria hair salon on the 2nd floor? Then I realized that all malls were pretty similar, and what I was recognizing was a mall not any mall in particular.
We first went into PacSun, to say "hello" to NN's husband. Racks of brightly colored tanks tops were 50% off, attracting our attention immediately. We browsed, chatted a bit, and left.
Next stop was Lord and Taylor. The three of us milled around the Clinique counter and SS chose teal and grey eyeshadows. Which one did we like better? SS showed us all the color possibilities on the back of her right hand. After choosing two eyeshadows and one eyeliner, she took her special bonus gift and we were off again.
Staying with the theme of makeup, we made it up to Sephora. I was intrigued by the all the tools, scary medieval torture devices to remove and lance black heads, heated eyelash curlers, electronic pimple zappers, and brushes for every type of make-up application. I bought a tube of clear mascara, A light blue eyeshadow, and NN some mascara.
Now, we all had make up in our bags and felt a little giddy from the purchase. What was that delicious smell? SS said it was Auntie Anne's pretzels. If only it was Cinnabon, I would have been all over that.
After the mall, SS said we could stop by the bike store, if I wanted. Very exciting. We all piled back into the minivan. I can't remember what we were talking about, but for some reason it I remember laughing and thinking I was 16 again.
Wait, the golden arches ahead! I said. SS pulled into the McDonald's "drive thru". I love drive through windows. Back in the days when I had a car, my car was always littered with In & Out napkins, and El Pollo Loco straws. A says she loves nothing better than a fountain Coke. SS got soft serve. I got french fries and NN had a McDonald's gift card for all our mid afternoon snacks.
We got to the bike store soon after. I had forgotten how in the suburbs space was less on an issue and marveled at the rows of bicycles. Unfortunately, they did not have the single speed bike I wanted. But our saleman, J, was overjoyed to talk to us. He made wild hand gestures and asked us to follow him so could write down all the websites that I could look at to assemble my own bike. And then he said this "Oh a day with the girls. That sounds like so much fun. I used to have all of these friends that were girls but not so much anymore. Strange since I am a theater major and all...." SS and I laughed a little bit because how great would have been to have a college boy to crush on...well if we were still in high school.
SS dropped off us all home and as the sliding door of the minivan closed, I thought a girl's club may not be such a bad idea.
Monday, July 02, 2007
A good example
My sister and I are the oldest cousins on my mother's side of the family. When we used to visit Korea as children we were by default the cool ones, the leaders, the pseudo-authority figures. My sister was a teenager then. She would read her books and listen to her walkman, as we would play outside in the muggy heat. My cousins would paint her pictures and beg her to please watch them preform somersaults and handstands. I would get irritated because their attention to her would disrupt our games. But it would be hard to fault them. She was cool even by normal American standards, which just meant that in Korea she was a goddess.
In 1996, we had a family reunion. Everyone came to visit us in California. One of my aunts had left Korea 1970, had never returned. So the reunion was full of touching moments of family members who had not seen each other in 26 years. That meant the 6 cousins were left in my care. My cousin J, still remembers when he did not go to bed, I simply slung him over my shoulder, climbed up the stairs, and threw him into his room. He was already taller and heavier than me by this time, but it is amazing what righteous ire can do to you physical limitations.
Over the years, I have gotten many e-mails from them. "Oh ET#1, I am in love with a boy and my mom really hates him. Can you please talk to her?" (My reply: You mom is correct. He is a loser. Dump him.) "Thank you for the care package. My roommate ate all the Oreos you sent." (My reply: Tell him that I smack him if he steals your food again) "Hi! Is it okay I practice my English with you. It is my best subject in school." (My reply: Of course it is, but do you think you could practice some Korean and buy me a mp3 player.)
Yes, they are pretty adorable. But lately, since most of them have graduated college, I have had less contact with them. They were adults and did not need us anymore. We get the occassional update from my gossipy aunt or grandma, but for the most part they are normal adults with jobs and signifiicant others.
One of my cousins, SU, is about the most talented person I know. When she was young she was concert pianist and an award winning painter. Everything comes easily to her. She is smart, fun and cute. Getting into college which is normally a huge stressor for Korean youth was a breeze for her. She is a little bit on the heavy side (still a good 10 pounds lighter than me though), so sometimes the teasing from her mother had left her with not the greatest self esteem. She recently graduated college with a degree in journalism, but decided to become an airline stewardess for Emirates (The official airline of the United Arab Emirates). No one in the family understood why she did it. It was her first defiant act ever.
Yesterday, I got an email from her. [translated poorly by me into English]:
Hi older sister[that's me], I cannot believe I have not seen you since 2003. Time goes by so fast. I will be in New York next week and wanted to know if you were near New York. I know you live in Eastern United States and I don't know how far you are. I would really like to see you. I would like to see how my older sister lives. The truth is I am living in Dubai now. I am a stewardess for Emirates. Life is difficult. Sometimes I get sad, lonely and homesick. My memory of you is how you always walk with confidence and nothing scares you. So I try everyday to be more like you. The flight from Dubai to New York is 14 hours long and will run frequently. There is a rumor that they might start flying to San Francisco one day. Hope to hear from you soon!
When I read the letter, I was so happy to get it. I sent a reply and then went to the lab. I ran some errands and came home to read my book club book. As I was taking a sip of my lemonade laced with a little gin, I thought, "oh crap." When did I become someone that someone tries to emulate? Wasn't I supposed to be the cautionary tale? When you don't listen to your parents and eat your greens you could become a 31 year old woman, who is still single with no prospects of ever having a boyfriend, who still does not have a job, and whose most expensive possession is a bicycle she obtained by shady means. Doesn't my cousin know that I am riddled with insecurities? Should I tell her?
I guess not. I want her to walk tall and have her adventures. And I'll admit my ego was greatly enhanced knowing someone thinks I am doing thing alright.
No matter how old we get, there will always those people who captured our admiration. It is hard to get perspective on these people we've put up on a pedestal. I wonder if my high school history teacher is riddled with doubts about the choices he made. Nah. He is infallible.
In 1996, we had a family reunion. Everyone came to visit us in California. One of my aunts had left Korea 1970, had never returned. So the reunion was full of touching moments of family members who had not seen each other in 26 years. That meant the 6 cousins were left in my care. My cousin J, still remembers when he did not go to bed, I simply slung him over my shoulder, climbed up the stairs, and threw him into his room. He was already taller and heavier than me by this time, but it is amazing what righteous ire can do to you physical limitations.
Over the years, I have gotten many e-mails from them. "Oh ET#1, I am in love with a boy and my mom really hates him. Can you please talk to her?" (My reply: You mom is correct. He is a loser. Dump him.) "Thank you for the care package. My roommate ate all the Oreos you sent." (My reply: Tell him that I smack him if he steals your food again) "Hi! Is it okay I practice my English with you. It is my best subject in school." (My reply: Of course it is, but do you think you could practice some Korean and buy me a mp3 player.)
Yes, they are pretty adorable. But lately, since most of them have graduated college, I have had less contact with them. They were adults and did not need us anymore. We get the occassional update from my gossipy aunt or grandma, but for the most part they are normal adults with jobs and signifiicant others.
One of my cousins, SU, is about the most talented person I know. When she was young she was concert pianist and an award winning painter. Everything comes easily to her. She is smart, fun and cute. Getting into college which is normally a huge stressor for Korean youth was a breeze for her. She is a little bit on the heavy side (still a good 10 pounds lighter than me though), so sometimes the teasing from her mother had left her with not the greatest self esteem. She recently graduated college with a degree in journalism, but decided to become an airline stewardess for Emirates (The official airline of the United Arab Emirates). No one in the family understood why she did it. It was her first defiant act ever.
Yesterday, I got an email from her. [translated poorly by me into English]:
Hi older sister[that's me], I cannot believe I have not seen you since 2003. Time goes by so fast. I will be in New York next week and wanted to know if you were near New York. I know you live in Eastern United States and I don't know how far you are. I would really like to see you. I would like to see how my older sister lives. The truth is I am living in Dubai now. I am a stewardess for Emirates. Life is difficult. Sometimes I get sad, lonely and homesick. My memory of you is how you always walk with confidence and nothing scares you. So I try everyday to be more like you. The flight from Dubai to New York is 14 hours long and will run frequently. There is a rumor that they might start flying to San Francisco one day. Hope to hear from you soon!
When I read the letter, I was so happy to get it. I sent a reply and then went to the lab. I ran some errands and came home to read my book club book. As I was taking a sip of my lemonade laced with a little gin, I thought, "oh crap." When did I become someone that someone tries to emulate? Wasn't I supposed to be the cautionary tale? When you don't listen to your parents and eat your greens you could become a 31 year old woman, who is still single with no prospects of ever having a boyfriend, who still does not have a job, and whose most expensive possession is a bicycle she obtained by shady means. Doesn't my cousin know that I am riddled with insecurities? Should I tell her?
I guess not. I want her to walk tall and have her adventures. And I'll admit my ego was greatly enhanced knowing someone thinks I am doing thing alright.
No matter how old we get, there will always those people who captured our admiration. It is hard to get perspective on these people we've put up on a pedestal. I wonder if my high school history teacher is riddled with doubts about the choices he made. Nah. He is infallible.
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