Update

My interactions with a previously mentioned attorney are deterioting fast. This attorney is mischaracterizing telephone conversations that we have had in emails that (s)he sends not only to the senior attorneys at my firm but also to his/her clients and my clients as well. This attorney LOVES sending emails to "the entire working group" rather than just to the attorneys, which is the standard practice. However, (s)he seems to be unable to find the "reply all" button when I "reply to all" and ask questions trying to figure out what exactly (s)he wants since her emails are poorly written and confusing. We have been going in circles over the interpretation of a statute and it appears as though we are at an impasse.

Here's an excerpt of a phone call we had at the end of the business day on Friday (which was actually only mid-day for me since I billed 16 hours on Friday...).

My phone rings; I answer:

ET#2: [ET#2]

CA: [No hello, no how are you, no end of the work week banter] I've gone over this with you before. I will not allow you to have that language in the [document].

ET#2: Hello, CA. What language are you referring to?

CA: [quotes language she is upset about]

ET#2: CA, I deleted that language in the last redraft.

CA: [technical and boring legalese arguments that no one needs to read about here]

ET#2: [I explain my position and tell CA that she is misquoting the statute which I have in front of me and I start to read it]

CA: [cutting me off] I don't NEED YOU to read ME the statue. I TEACH THIS STUFF.... You haven't been in practice as LONG as I have...

ET#2: [I am this close to saying, It's not my fault that you graduated from law school the year I was born and that you are illiterate. Instead I say] CA, if you READ the plain language of the statute, it doesn't say what you are saying...

This sort of back and forth goes on for about 10 more minutes. This was the first time that I have ever raised my voice at another attorney. At one point CA said that in all of the transactions that (s)he had done, (s)he had never seen it done this way. I said that I see them all the time [not to toon my own horn, but it is common knowledge within the industry that my firm is THE firm to go to for these sorts of transactions].

CA then said [in a tone of voice that was dripping with sarcasm] "I guess your firm is "cutting edge" and sees these all the time and that's why you're there."

My reply, "Yes, and I think that we can agree that we are going around in circles on this and that we just disagree." CA then said that (s)he had to leave for Shabbos and that we'd pick this up on Monday and then proceeded to HANG UP ON ME. Never in my admittedly short career (technically I think I'm a 5th year) has another attorney been so rude to me. Actually, I don't think that I have ever interacted with anyone as unprofessional as CA (with the exception of one of my bosses back in college that sexually harrassed me, but that's another story). When is it ever acceptable to hang up on someone in a business setting, especially when you are supposed to be trying to make the deal HAPPEN?

I am at my wit's end. I see CA's number on my caller ID and I start to get angry before I even lift the receiver. But, I refuse to sink to her level. I don't want other people saying that "ET#2 is a deal killer". I'm a problem solver.

Ala Moana, Haiku Gardens, and the Dole Pineapple Plantation

Here are some photos of our tropical vacation:

More or less...

Evil brought it to my attention that it's been a while since I have posted. The reason for this? In addition to travelling to a tropical island paradise for a wedding, I have been buried in work lately. Every time I think I am almost caught up, something happens and I am once again trapped under a mountain of paper work, endless conference calls, and painfully long meetings. I had a 13 hour meeting at a client's office on Tuesday. THIRTEEN hours!! The junior associate representing the other side and I were in heated negotiations and completely lost track of time -- it was 10:30 pm when we realized that there was no one left in the office (the clients had left around 6:00, the senior partners around 7:00, leaving us behind to draft the damn documents) who could order dinner. Once I realized that it had been 10 hours since my last meal, I was suddenly ravenous and no longer able to concentrate on the piles of contracts in front of me. A person can only negotiate, draft and review documents for so long before losing it. Much of what we wrote at 10:45 made little sense the next morning. We ended up leaving my client's office at 11:00. It is 2 days since that meeting and I am still working out the kinks on these damn documents. But the end is in sight. I can start to catch up on all the work that I was supposed to be doing this week this weekend... Oh wait, I have a conference for work to go to all day on Saturday. Damn. Whatever happened to the weekend being a time to rest?

I just got off a 30 minute phone call for a different transaction. What is so surprising to me is that this 30 minute call was several orders of magnitude MORE painful than the 3 days of negotiating and drafting on an empty stomach that I described above. I am wishing that there was a formula for billing my time whereby the more painful an assignment, the more expensive it is (e.g., 30 minute call with incredibly condescending attorney = 10 days of drafting at client's offices). I am going to do a lot of "rounding up" when I input my time for that call.

Too nerdy

It was chilly on Wednesday night. The wind was whipping around Huntington Ave.. I decided to get out of the lab to do some paperwork. I took the 66 bus up to Allston for some spicy Korean seafood noodle soup.

As I unwrapped myself from my scarf, hat, gloves, coat, and fleece vest I nodded to the waitress held up my finger indicating I would be dining alone that night. She spoke to me in Korean, and when I responded in English I could see the wheels clicking in her head. "That girl is Chinese."

I take out a stack of scientific journal articles I need to read. My soup comes out pretty quickly so it is a delicate balance of slurping and reading. Little red splashes landed all over my papers.

I was half way through my meal when I saw a girl wave. I waved back, but without my glasses I had no idea who she was. Crap. It was one of my former students. She walked over to my table with a boy. She introduced me to her boyfriend. And then she said, "Oh are you reading papers?"

"Ummm...Yes," I replied.

"Guess there is a lot of work in grad school," she said. I saw a glint of pity in her eye. "So what did you order?

"Ummm....noodle soup." I replied.

The waitress asks if my former student and her date want to sit at the table next to me.

"No, I think we will sit there," she said while pointing to a table across the room. "Right?[she says in my direction] you seem to have a lot of reading to do."

"Ummm...yeah, I got to finish this stuff, " I lied. "Well enjoy your dinner and ...." I could not think of a good way to end the conversation so I blurted out, "....don't forget there is a Lunar Eclipse tonight."

Doh!

We love love the Likelike Highway - Part # 3

The Likelike (pronounced LEE-keh-LEE-keh) Highway is one of the few passages that connect the North and South sides of Oahu. More importantly, it is fun to say. Likelike Likelike Likelike. Try it. Now I know it is the name of one the island princesses, and I mean no disrespect but for some reason repeating Hawaiian words brings me joy. For instance, our hotel was next to Ala Moana (pronounced ah-la moe-AH-nah) Park. Ala Moana Ala Moana Ala Moana. Ask ET#2 her favorite word and it would probably be Kahaaa (ka-HA-ah-ah-ah) for its abundance of A's.

The Bride, born and raised on the island, told us a joke about it. How do you know when you are speaking to someone who just moved to the island? They try to call the Pipeline, PEE-peh-LEE-neh.

The wedding
Saturday-
I know this sounds strange from a man-hating anti-romantic scientific-minded cynic, but I love weddings. Each one I've attended, has a special place in my memories. I know that every bride has slaved over the minutiae, has thrown a hissy fit or two, and embedded part of her personality into the event.

Saturday was all about the wedding. ET#2 and I woke up at 6:45 to shower and go on a coffee run for the Bride. Considering the wedding was at 11am, it really was not that early. When we arrived to the Bride's hotel room, everything was already abuzz with makeup artists and wedding party attendants.

[It is probably to important to make note that the Bride, much like Molly Ringwald in "Pretty in Pink" reconstructed a dress to her specifications. Unlike Molly Ringwald's frock, the dress was pretty and perfect for the Bride.]

After we all got made up, three of the bridesmaids got in the Bride's gray Toyota Corolla and headed for the Haiku Gardens: down Ala Moana Blvd., to Kalihi St., up the Likelike Hwy, then onto the Kahekili Hwy and turned on Haiku Rd.. We were on island time, a little late but not horribly.

Everything ran smoothly. The priest greeted the guests with a hypnotizing Hawaiian chant in his gentle baritone. A few funny moments. Lots of tears. And then the Bride and Groom were married.

The reception was in an open air restaurant overlooking the gardens. There was entertainment. A Hawaiian styled folk singer (a white dude in a floral print shirt), Filipino dancers (donated by the Bride's Godmother), and Tahitian dancers (the teens that live across the street from the Bride and Groom). Multiple toasts, including one by ET#2, the Maid of Honor, invoking memories of our college days.

There are more stories, I am sure, but I think I will end our Hawaiian adventure there.

Aloha a hui hou kakou. Try saying that three times fast.

We love love the Likelike Highway - Part #2

It has been less than a week and memories of Hawaii are rapidly fading. Rain, wind, and subzero temps have scrubbed out what is left of my tan. Maybe that is a why I am a little depressed. Instead of going out and binge drinking like I normally would, I am at home watching the Celine Dion Special as I update the blog.

It's Just Like Fantasy Island
No midgets, but there was no mistake that Hawaii was fantastic. With only a short time on the island it was hard to get an actual itinerary together. So lucky for us the Bride organized events everyday.

Thursday -
The morning was spent in a garden restaurant called the Willows. The Bride's aunt wanted to throw her a party. It was our first introduction to a Fantasy Island like place. The restaurant is outdoors on a series of wooden platforms over a man-made garden. Tropical plants and a waterfall matched the thatched roof and open air seating. As we walked in a young man in floral print shirt took drink orders for plantation ice teas (pineapple juice and tea). We sat around at the henfest. It was an all you can eat buffet, something I always can go for. Luckily, I was wearing a forgiving skirt. And while there were basic bridal things going on, I could not helped be hypnotized by the cascading water. The day was misty and rainy and warm enough to drink iced drinks. The whole restaurant seemed to be shrouded in a cloud that only Mr. Rourke could penetrate.

Later that night was a catamaran cruise. I had to skip this event as I am not good on the water. Something I only discovered this summer. Instead I watched the sunset on the beach. It was still a little cloudy and the sky lit up in dark reds. The sky in Hawaii is another thing that was amazing. Everyday I was there I saw a rainbow. And not just any rainbow, but rainbows that are full arcs with all seven colors prominent. Who knew those my crayon drawings from the first grade could come true?

Friday-
ET#2 and I woke up early in the morning feeling a little antsy. We called KenTak3's and Mamacita's room to see if they wanted to go for a run. The four of us suited up and headed to Ala Moana Beach Park, which was across the street. In the park we jogged along the beach, witnessed homeless people getting fed, and poured out sweat in the tropical humidity.

The wedding rehearsal was at noon. We showered and got ready to head out to the Haiku Gardens. The Haiku Gardens is a popular wedding site and it is easy to see why. Do you remember how in the show there was a scene where the elderly couple all of a sudden are young again and running through the lush tropics? That was Haiku gardens. It was a little muddy from the rain, but every thing was a bright verdant. The flowers were all red and white, and in background there was a green mountain whose peak was covered by white mist.

Sometimes Mr. Rourke will lead a perhaps research scientist to fulfill her dreams of singing stardom. And so went our night of karoke. The Bride and Groom rented out a large karoke room filled it with food and libations. I was giddy to have my moment under the lights. What would we sing? All of the Bride's and Grooms extended family were in attendance. Would we make asses of ourselves? Naturally. Mamacita confessed to me that she had never karoke'd before. What? That would change shortly.

ET#2, the Bride, I are old pros at this and have our signature songs. ET#2 has a strong penchant for all songs by the Backstreet Boys, and she debated between "As long as you love me" and "Quit playing games with my heart." I enjoy bad eighties crap so I sang a little Peter Cetera and some Elton John. Perhaps one of the highlights was Mamacita and Kentak3 doing a duet. Mainly. because we think Kentak3's deep baritone, attracted one of the Groom's male cousins. Apparently no amount of having his arm around his financee would shake this dude.


Tropical locales and wish fulfillment and high laughter, seriously where is Tatoo when you need him?

We love love the Likelike Highway - Part#1

Aloha!

What a week it has been. I was negligent in last week's post due to the fact that my computer has some kind of virus that keeps popping up internet explorer and no amount of reformatting seems to get rid of it. Sigh. But all of those computer woes were washed away from my mind during my week in paradise aka Hawaii.

I arrived in Honolulu on Tuesday afternoon. When I asked a young man in a flower print shirt where I could catch the airport shuttle bus to Waikiki, he pointed to a sign that said "Ground Transportation." Then he said, "I'm sorry you are here for such bad weather." Huh? I was extremely confused. Sure it was a little cloudy, but it was 75 degrees with a slight tropical breeze and I had just come from a city that had freezing rain. Einstein was proved right again, all things are relative.

Wednesday - a day of romance.
Since my boyfriend, George Clooney, was otherwise occupied this week, I resigned myself to sulk in my hotel room (it was bad weather after all). Instead Evil Twin #2 and I decided to take a drive around the island of Oahu.

First stop-Dole Plantation.
We had a breakfast of cinnamon roasted macadamia nuts, the freshest pinapple ever, and some weird pinapple ice cream that kind of tasted like feet. After a stroll in the pinapple garden, we took pictures of ourselves in large wooden cutouts of Pinapple Pete. Maybe ET#2 will post them. Maybe not.

Second stop - Waimae beach
Our only goal for the day was to eat at a shrimp truck in Kahuku, so we played most of the day by ear. We were cruising along the Kamehameha Highway and decided to stop to enjoy some beach time. We pulled into a muddy parking lot and followed some surfers across the street. The sand was white, the water was navy and turquoise, and there were white puffy clouds in the blue sky. Another perfect moment in Paradise. We walked hand in hand in the soft white sand our hair blowing in the breeze .... okay wait we were not in a Valtrex comercial, but we could have been. The beach was virtually empty except for some leathery italians, a woman walking her dogs and a life guard with lots of ab muscles cleaning off with a gallon of water over his head. We sat down and watched some amateur surfers in distance tackle the waves.

Third stop - Food trucks
Fresh young coconuts were sold on the side of the road. Since ET#2 and I had sucker written on our foreheads, ET#2 paid some unwholly sum for two coconuts. The lady cut them with a large knife and we drank them by the side of the road. Then the lady cut them in half and we ate the coconut meat. Since we drank something sweet, it was time for the salty goodness of shrimp cooked in butter oil and garlic. Giovanni's is destination for many tourists on the island. It has two trucks one for shrimp and one for shaved ice. Tables and shade are set out in the gravel parking lot. We ordered two shrimp scampis, which are served with two scoops of sushi rice covered in garlic pieces and scampi sauce. The ultimate in fusion cuisine.

Fourth stop - the pipeline
After our garlicky meal, we decided to check out the surfers on the Pipeline. The north shore is the windy side of the island. This can be seen not only by the higher number of surfers but also the change in foiliage. It is denser and lusher. Along the Bonzai Pipeline, the sand is much coarser. We sat down next to a nice geriatric couple and watched the surfers. Since the waves were substandard, there were not that many elite surfers in the water. We did get to see whales junping in the distance. At the bathrooms, ET#2 found an admirer who followed her out, asked for the time, and commented how much he liked her dress. It was not a love connection.

Fifth stop - Coffee and portugese coconut buns
Our bride friend wanted us to meet her later that afternoon to help assemble some wedding programs. I got lost and we stopped at a Portugese bakery for some coffee. Behind the counter was a very good looking Happa boy. ET#2 told me that he was going to be a lawyer. That is what the fortune teller who was in the bakery told him. ET#2 was intriguied enough by their conversation that she ordered a coconut bun to not look suspicious as she stayed in the front to eavesdrop. A good decision because that thing was delicious. We made it to the Starbucks in which the bride and groom were meeting the videographer. This Pearlridge Starbucks was a one stop shopping for all of one's wedding needs. When we got there, there were our friends, and next to them a wedding photographer, and behind them a DJay and an asian bride-to-be that burst into tears.

We did some bridal bonding after that. More to come.....